"You’re the straightest gay guy I kn-"
"You’re not like those other gay people who go to those awful pride para-"
"You’re gay? Then why don’t you hit on me or other gu-"
"I have this other gay friend, you’d be a perfect cou-"
"At least you act norm-"
"I’m straight but would you suck my dick for 20 dol-"
*violently refreshes your blog until you answer my anon message*
THINGS I’VE LEARNED NOT TO DO WHILE MAKING PANCAKES:
- DON´T TOUCH THE PAN TO MAKE SURE IT’S HOT
(that’s a bandaid by the way)
- DON’T LEAVE TO TAKE A PICTURE OF YOUR FINGER WHILE THERE´S STILL A PANCAKE IN THE PAN
tip #1: text her “I H8 U” while standing right in front of her, a baller ass move she’ll never see coming
Come inside to secret dog HQ
it is not your fault if you fail. you are made up of billions of cells. it is their fault